spandex-wearing bicycle douchebags: rant

Discussion in 'The Guru's Pub' started by Dillinger, Sep 21, 2013.

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  1. ViperXtreme

    ViperXtreme Ancient Guru

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    Mountain biker here as well (tho i do long road trips sometimes, replace tires with semi slicks/semi knobby), those tight fits can really help in comfort.

    In our place, there are no bike lanes (save for a few cities), bikers (both pedal and engine) mostly dont have discipline and will mostly ignore traffic rules '__'
     
  2. Pete J

    Pete J Master Guru

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    Some of those as well
    That reminds me. Are horse owners supposed to clean up after their animal when it takes a dump? Dog owners have to, after all.
     
  3. Speed Weed

    Speed Weed Maha Guru

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    But horses are vegetarians, Pete J, and that does make a helluva difference if you accidentally kick a lump of horse crap on the road.
    Unlike dog$hit, horse$hit can be used as a garden fertiliser.
    In my area, I've seen gardeners out with buckets collecting the stuff.
    Apparently onions thrive on it. ;)
     
  4. kanej2007

    kanej2007 Ancient Guru

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    I've never seen a cop pick up horse crap after it's taken a dump in the middle of the road...
     

  5. Loophole35

    Loophole35 Ancient Guru

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    I've seen plenty of cops speed and run red lights your point is moot they don't follow the laws they are paid to enforce.
     
  6. kanej2007

    kanej2007 Ancient Guru

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    Tell that to Hallryru. :D
     
  7. Zareph

    Zareph Ancient Guru

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    I get what you mean, OP.

    But spandex is great - in time, all will bow to the Vanu Sovereignty. :banana:
     
  8. IcE

    IcE Don Snow Staff Member

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    EXCUSE ME SIR. It's you're. The absolute nerve you have. Cheeky buggers like you deserve to be fined for such outbursts of barbarity.
     
  9. pogostickio

    pogostickio Master Guru

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    that made me laugh out loud.

    I totally agree. If a car / van / lorry / bus driver is so impatient that they need to overtake then fine. Do it. Just don't bash my handlebars on the way past please.

    And I always wear a pair of lycra shorts for the blue foam comfort but under a pair of combat or waterproof pants. It's just not cool to show your junk in public. :)
     
  10. ManofGod

    ManofGod Maha Guru

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    Yeah, just wear a pair of shorts and get rub burn and bleeding instead. :puke2: Or better yet, where a pair of work slacks or jeans. :bang: Man, you have not freaking clue what you are talking about, are you just trolling or serious, I am not sure?

    Bike pants are designed to work with biking. It is a shame you can come on here and post about something you clearly have no clue about. Let me guess, you want to run over us runners as well? How about getting off your own butt and loosing some weight instead of being jealous of other peoples efforts?

    Better yet, turn your car in and walk to work before you kill someone, JERK!
     

  11. ManofGod

    ManofGod Maha Guru

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    Personally, I find when it comes to the AMD section, they are far better than most anything else out there. I appreciate being able to read and posts things without an Intel fanboy coming in and trying to justify his purchase.
     
  12. ManofGod

    ManofGod Maha Guru

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    Yeah, those darned cyclist, there is no way they ever drive a car. :stewpid:
     
  13. Dillinger

    Dillinger Master Guru

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    Thanks for enlightening me on why spandex is far more superior than any other clothing material known to man.

    Just after you posted that comment I literally went out and bought myself a spandex outfit. It's all I plan on wearing from now on.

    Here I am all decked out and all I can say is wow, I've never felt so aerodynamic in my life.

    Since I now walk faster than usual I had to make a special helmet for safety. It works pretty well.

    [​IMG]
     
  14. ManofGod

    ManofGod Maha Guru

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    Yep, troll, never mind, carry on, you are doing a splendid job. :3eyes:
     
  15. Tom F

    Tom F Ancient Guru

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    Nice choice man, never seen the point in the expensive Rapha stuff myself but you're looking like King of the Mountain already.

    BTW, it's Lycra you're after, not spandex. Should still be alright for your Zumba classes though!
     

  16. ManofGod

    ManofGod Maha Guru

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    No Zumba for me, that is too fast paced. :) Yoga, on the other hand, is what I have just started for strengthening and flexibility for competitive running. :D
     
  17. reno_skychaser

    reno_skychaser Ancient Guru

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    Personally I hate riding on the roads because they're not made for bikes. There's car traffic, lights, lanes of travel, rough spots (particularly rough on 90psi bike tires), and people like the OP who hate you. No offense to his opinion, everyone's entitled to them, but people like him are the reason I hate being on the road. Show me a good trail and I'm there, though.
     
  18. Doug

    Doug Ancient Guru

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    If you like riding at speed with your shorts like Maralyn Monroe's skirt also acting as a wind-brake then that's cool. Probably be a really good cyclist. You gonna go to the next Olympics and have a go at all the athletes for not wearing jeans? Or the swimmers for wearing something, ya know.. aerodynamic.. instead of a jedi robe?

    And you should realise that they couldn't give a tiny **** about your weird problem with another persons proper exercise attire, so the problem is ENTIRELY in your head and not theirs, for no reason, cool huh :)

    (if you didn't know, Lance has been stripped of his titles as he is a cheating, horrible bastard.)
     
  19. F1refly

    F1refly Ancient Guru

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    Is this the same type of mental dysfunction that leads one to hate based on their ideas or beliefs or is this some other mental issue?
     
  20. Dillinger

    Dillinger Master Guru

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    I created this thread with the intentions of it being a joke, but I see no one finds my humor funny and is taking it to heart. Fare enough, I'll just request it to be closed.
     
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