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My mom passed away

Discussion in 'The Guru's Pub' started by Year, Feb 21, 2014.

  1. W@w@Y

    W@w@Y Ancient Guru

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    condolences to you and your family year
     
  2. FULMTL

    FULMTL Ancient Guru

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    :(

    Sorry to hear that...
     
  3. kanej2007

    kanej2007 Ancient Guru

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    Sorry to hear of your loss Year. May your Mother RIP.
     
  4. mitzi76

    mitzi76 Ancient Guru

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    Condolences.

    Not great watching a loved one suffer or losing them to cancer. But you have to remember they would want you to be happy so you carry on and honour their memory.
     
    Last edited: Feb 22, 2014

  5. Bohi2_OGU

    Bohi2_OGU Member Guru

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    Sorry to hear your lost it hurt so much i can feel the pain. I know doctors can be an ass sometimes my wife as a multiple congenital heart and lung defect. Some time ago we watched tv and suddenly she was 'gone' checked pulse and respiration nothing of all. Called 112 and started cpr after 8min police showed up as well 1 min after that paramedics, her puls and respiration was back during my cpr. In the local hospital i was told she got a epileptic attack, really? You are wrong i did say. Several investigations later nothing was wrong in her head to point at a epileptic attack. Her real hospital, 110 km ahead, could not say what was happened because its simply hard to tell. Several weeks later we where at a dinner with parents on Easter day and suddenly she call my name and dang she was 'gone' again, parents called 112 and i started soon the cpr again same thing. This time i couldn't bring her 'back' at the time paramedics showed up the firedeparment was first. The used a defibrillator and after 2 chocks she was breathing again. In the hospital they started to infuse morfine, i told them dont do that she got a cardial arrest and then dont start morfine, there can be a change of appatical breathing but they where stubborn and did anyway because of a satturations of 80% (oxygen level in blood) I say thats normal for her 80 till 85%. Anway at night they call me and say she wants to talk to me, i called everyone up and we went to the hospital. Before i could she her we waited up by several nurses and a doctor. Short story short i was forced to made a decision of ending her life by a spray so she could breath easier but she will not wake up again, seriously? All family members where convinced they were right and approve this. But i dont and mother in law said on a certain moment i put her life in your hands. So i said bring her over to the hospital 110km away, they refused and the next morning the cardiologist saw she is improved a bit and she will goto that other hospital. But now the paramedics refused to transport her over omg does this never stop. Got angry and on the end the cardiologist goes with her and at the time we got there her own cardiologist (they know each other 37 years now ) stopped immediately the morfine and i was right on the end.

    Stayed from start 2 weeks on her hospital bed slept there next to her and she got 9 times a cardiac arrest, there was a intoxication between 2 medicines so that the heart sinus node goes nuts. She is 40 now and still lives with me we have a hard time now and then but she still lifes. This is one of the occasions we past but.....

    Your words; wrong diagnosis, doctors playing heroes, watching your dear slipping away and actual death, anything more painful in life, touch me to the bone and i feel with you as i can feel with your sorrow. The frustration of powerlessness and being angry is normal i guess. But i hope you find your strength back and dont lock your up as you now all alone. In your thoughts cherish your lovely moments and hopefully the doctors heroes acting bad taste fade out a bit. That will be a struggle i know your mixed up with all kind of feelings but again think of your self a bit and do nice stuff how hard that may sounds to do.

    I wish you much strength in the near future and take care much of your self if you feel the need of private talk you can pm me with no hesitation, as you say you alone now but if you want to talk then you not alone.

    May your mother rest in peace.
     
    Last edited: Feb 22, 2014
  6. Year

    Year Ancient Guru

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    you guys are amazing really, i can't thank you enough for your support, every single one of you here on guru3d without any exception, anonymous, friends, all of you. it means a lot. :)

    also your stories touch me because i can relate, you must have lived through something like this to really know what it means and how much it hurts.

    afaik what my mom had was incurable anyway, pancreatic cancer is among the deadliest, you have more chance of getting better from brain cancer than pancreatic cancer, so even if the diagnosis was right they would've prolonged her life another year then she would've died anyway, i find a little bit of comfort that at least she wasn't hit by a truck and i had to pick up the pieces or something like that, that would've been even worse, so in a way i consider myself lucky that she died on a bed and i got the chance to kiss her hands and forehead, some people never had this chance, i did.

    i remember a few days before dying she said to me "you are my cure, not the meds". those words still ring into my ear till this very moment, the hurt is tremendous but i feel happy that she loved me more than anything in the world, i'm trying to see the positive in all of this, it's a process i have to go through it there's no way out.

    as for Guru3D, we're human beings afterall, whether it's me, you or even Hilbert himself, we're human beings with a real life and a real family many with the very same issues like kids, money, addiction or even death, it's essential to learn about new technology in a community like this, but likewise it's very important to help and or advise any user who's in need of a little help with the often unforgiving life issues, you don't do it because religion says so, nor for money or even a thanks, you do it in order to grow from the inside and become a better person.

    /Year.
     
  7. signex

    signex Ancient Guru

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    You're most welcome mate!

    How are you holding up atm?
     
  8. darrensimmons

    darrensimmons Ancient Guru

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    I am truly sorry for your loss and my heartfelt wishes go out to you and your family.
     
  9. Elder III

    Elder III Ancient Guru

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    Thoughts and prayers for you man. As some others have said already, don't be afraid to reach out to friends, family, church etc... having someone to share the burden and sorrow with goes a long ways towards helping you to cope with it. There is nothing magical that will remove that sadness, and you will always have your memories, both good and bad. It's just that having companions is helpful for the grieving process, just knowing that other people care and are there for you is some of the best medicine you can have in this kind of situation. --- I hope that makes sense, I'm not always the most articulate of people. Oh, definitely get a puppy or any kind of dog. Man's best friend for sure. :)
     
  10. CPC_RedDawn

    CPC_RedDawn Ancient Guru

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    Year, I feel for you bro, my heart felt condolences to you and the rest of your family.

    I lost my Mom back in October 2005 when I was 17 years old to the ****er than is cancer. It was an insanely hard time, but I surrounded my self with good friends and my family pulled together. It will be 9 years this October and I will admit it doesn't get any easier knowing she is not there, but it does get easier to deal with over time.

    Mourn your loss, but don't forget to celebrate her life as well!

    Stay strong mate, best wishes to you and all your family for the future!
     
    Last edited: Feb 22, 2014

  11. Shadowsoldier

    Shadowsoldier Ancient Guru

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    I am very sorry my dear friend. My mom is my best friend so it must be unbearable right now. But from what you have seen, the members of GURU3D have your back and will always have your back! Good luck my friend, you will get through it ,I just know it!
     
  12. Damage_Plan

    Damage_Plan Master Guru

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    sorry to hear this Guy.... I am an Italian dude, and you know how the story goes with italians, being momma's boys...... I could never dream of the day my mother dies.... my bond with her is stronger than anything and im her only kid too.... I remember when i was probably 5 years old, my mom dropped me off at daycare and alllways had a lunch Packed for me i used to cry my ass off so bad when she went to work (im sure the ladies who ran the day care hated me for it lol) but after i had ate my lunch she packed me, I would hug my lunch box and save the wrappers and trash that was left over... because i missed her.

    My dad wasnt around at all and she was the only one i cared about..

    so even tho i dont know what its like to lose my mom to death, (im hoping i wont have to for a long time) i feel your pain. and i know how special moms are!!!!

    Very sorry for your loss buddy. Hope you can find the silver lining in all of this. most importantly just remember how happy she made you throughout your life. and celebrate her!
     
    Last edited: Feb 22, 2014
  13. Rich_Guy

    Rich_Guy Ancient Guru

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    Sorry for your loss Year :(, condolences to you and the rest of your family at this difficult time.

    May your mom RIP.
     
  14. John

    John Ancient Guru

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    Very sorry to hear this, Year. My condolences to you and your family.
     
  15. slickric21

    slickric21 Ancient Guru

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    Dude really sorry to hear this devastating news for you.

    I know how you feel as I lost my Dad in 2012 suddenly.
    He'd been in hospital with breathing problems as had asthma, they released him after a week...but didnt pick up he had pneumonia. He passed in his sleep a few days later.
    I was very close to my Dad as my parents were separated my Sis and I were raised by our Dad.

    I remember feeling at the time how can the World go on as normal as if nothing has happened when it has just changed so much for me and will never be the same again.

    The lack of interest in anything is normal at this time, things do get easier and better, but it takes time my friend, a lot of time.

    You just have to take one step at a time mate. Your Mum will always be with you.
    Sometimes I have dreams with my Dad in them, and for a few moments after I wake up its so great as I feel like ive just spent time with him, so he does live on.

    Be strong and all the best.
     

  16. HonoredShadow

    HonoredShadow Ancient Guru

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    Really sorry to hear about your lose Year. Hope things get better in time.
     
  17. Pvfc-Epic

    Pvfc-Epic Maha Guru

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    condolences mate,

    all the love in the world from me to you, chin up they are in a better place now
     
  18. allesclar

    allesclar Ancient Guru

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    May she rest in piece.
     
  19. 1Bravo

    1Bravo Member Guru

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    I am very sorry for your loss.

    I'm 44 old married with kids and my mother is still my best friend. Every day it goes by I keep thinking on enjoying my mother the best I can.
     
  20. logout20

    logout20 Member

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    time will heal everything mate...
     

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