Discussion in 'The Guru's Pub' started by trodas, Jul 9, 2014.
Q) What do you call a Spanish footballer with no legs?
There was a Polish guy who wanted to be a terrorist. The group told him he had to prove himself worthy first. They sent him out to blow up a car and all he managed to do is burn his mouth on the tailpipe.
Q: How do you call a dog that has no legs?
A: You don´t call him, you go get him!
hahahaha i hate my life...
What did the Salad say to his best friends when his favorite song came on the radio?
Lettuce Turnip the Beet.
Ever had sex while camping?....It's ****ing intents.
No, the guy is thief. They just call themselves politicians... Got it now?
Btw Trodas, are you Pavel, ex-Amigan?
I think almost all bi-lingual people would agree on that.
zipper - yep And I still believe that Amiga OS was the best OS ever made - mainly because it was a microkernel, unlike MacOS, Linux or Winblows
But when I started picking on Facebook... then I finish in style:
Face book Mondo parody
Looks better in WEBM, but that img extension is not supported there...
You ask someone 'What hand do you use to wipe your ass?'
They will reply either 'My right hand.' or 'My left hand.'
You reply 'I use toilet paper.'
If you live in a multicultural country sometimes people will ask you; Where were you born? You reply Between my mothers legs.
lol, so funny
Agreed - you could control the OS and not visa versa like now ... still have my A500T living (at least last summer when launced the last time).
Here's an international joke with a local twist:
A Finn, Norwegian, Swede, German and Russian are traveling on an airplane.
Suddenly, the captain announces that the plane's losing altitude and they must reduce weight to compensate (but there aren't any parachutes on the plane).
First, the Russian decides to sacrifice himself and jump off the plane and says: "long live Mother Russia!"
The plane's still dropping, so next the German jumps off and declares: "long live The Third Reich!"
At this point the captain announces that one person still must go.
The Finn and Norwegian both stand up, throw the Swede out of the plane and declare: "long live Scandinavian co-operation!"
(No offense to anyone intented)
Q: Which is the odd one out: a woman, a microwave or a fridge?
A: The microwave, the other two leak when they’re ****ed.
Q: What's the difference between a woman and a coffin?
A: You come in one and go in the other.
Q: Whats the difference between PMS and Mad Cow Disease?
A: One attacks the cow's brain and sends it ****ing mental, the other is an agricultural problem.
Q: How do you know that beer contains female hormones?
A: Drink two or three, and you cannot drive properly anymore and start talking bull****.
Q: What do toy railways and boobs have in common?
A: Both are made for children but it's the fathers who play with them most.
Q: Why can't you trust a woman?
A: How can you trust something that bleeds for five days and doesn't die?
Q: Why do most men die before their wives?
A: They want to!
Q: What food diminishes a woman's sex drive by 90%?
A: Wedding Cake!
do what they told you
i don't get it
hahahaha like that!
hint: pay more to not get infected is true for routers and hookers
smoke by a gas pump