Funny jokes

Discussion in 'The Guru's Pub' started by trodas, Jul 9, 2014.

  1. elkosith

    elkosith Maha Guru

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    An American, a French, a Chinese, and an Indonesian were on a cruise. After dinner they gathered on the port side, viewing the ocean, and had a conversation. Not long, they started to show off how great their home country was.

    The American pulled a carton of Marlboro from his coat, took a pack, threw the rest of the packs to the ocean. He opened the pack, took one cigarette, lighted it up, then threw the pack into the ocean.

    The Indonesian said: Whoaa, why you threw that? It's such a waste!

    American: It's all right, we have plenty of those back home

    The French then started to show off. He took a bottle of a very expensive French perfume. He sprayed the perfume to his body once, then threw it into the ocean.

    The Indonesian said: Whoaa, why you threw that? It's such a waste!

    French: It's all right, we have plenty of those back home.

    Then out of sudden, the Indonesian grabbed the Chinese, picked him up, and threw him into the ocean.

    The American and French were shocked and asked in unison: What the hell, why did you do that?

    Indonesian (calmly): It's all right, we have plenty of those back home.
     
  2. BLEH!

    BLEH! Ancient Guru

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    Broken pencils are pointless.
     
  3. scoter man1

    scoter man1 Ancient Guru

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    Wow, that first post just made me remember quitting memecenter a few days ago.
     
  4. scatman839

    scatman839 Ancient Guru

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    also known as the front page of reddit, 4chan, or the vault of fail

    but pick reddit
     

  5. Dch48

    Dch48 Ancient Guru

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    The guy is a politician. Not sure about the girl so don't get that one unless she's just another character in the game.
     
  6. (.)(.)

    (.)(.) Banned

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    What has more threads than a t-shirt?

    Watch Dogs.
     
  7. kanej2007

    kanej2007 Ancient Guru

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    Great jokes gurus, many of which I liked.

    They at least brighten my boring day sitting in this $hitting office!

    Keep the jokes cumming guys. :)
     
  8. John Dolan

    John Dolan Ancient Guru

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    My new girlfriend said she had never seen a penis before so I showed her mine.

    WOW she said it looks just like a cock but smaller.
     
  9. Grand Master

    Grand Master Member

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    Once a naive asked to name a thoothless mammal.He answer:my grandma :)
     
  10. TaskMaster

    TaskMaster Maha Guru

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  11. Grand Master

    Grand Master Member

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    Lol no body knows your life neighter cares.
     
  12. scipio

    scipio Ancient Guru

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    ????
     
  13. mitzi76

    mitzi76 Ancient Guru

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    Haha! Amen! atm..
     
  14. Grand Master

    Grand Master Member

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    The naive didnt knew that girls dont have a cock.
     
  15. jbmcmillan

    jbmcmillan Ancient Guru

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    This has convinced me that humor doesn't translate well.
     

  16. Grand Master

    Grand Master Member

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    Could be
     
  17. Palerider

    Palerider Ancient Guru

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    What's red and smells like blue paint?

    Red paint






    What's red and is bad for your teeth?


    A brick




    When I die I want to go peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather. Not screaming like his passengers.
     
  18. elkosith

    elkosith Maha Guru

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    A cup of hot tea is bad for your eyes. Trust me. If you don't, try put it on your eyes yourself
     
  19. TaskMaster

    TaskMaster Maha Guru

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    lol its a joke thread lol and i know nobody knows my life lol, so relax lol. lol.
     
  20. BLEH!

    BLEH! Ancient Guru

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    War does not determine who is right, only who is left.
     

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